My, the things that change in a year

Really? August 2009? That was a whole life ago. It was a one-year birthday ago. A pregnancy plus three months ago. A whole house ago. That was a whole life ago.

A three-month old sleeps quietly in the swing across the room. Her older sister, who was two months old the last I had a chance to write (a whole life ago), sleeps in her bed upstairs. Same dog asleep at me feet, though. That much has stayed the same. I'm sure she'd disagree with me. Especially when Virginia screams, "Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadi," and runs towards her to pull her ears. And now I have to tell her to drop the toy she brings me in her mouth when we get home from errands. The toys aren't hers anymore. They are Virginia's. But back to wherever I was heading.

It's quiet. Right now, in this house, it's quiet. There are dishes (bottles, mostly) in the sink. The laundry needs to be done. I have no idea what I'll make for dinner. Dangerous spot to be in with two kids at 2:45 pm. Things tend to fall apart around 4. That makes for un-fun dinner makin'. But, RIGHT NOW, it's quiet. And I can't believe how long it's been since I've been here. I'm proud of myself for forming semi-coherent sentences. I knew they were locked away somewhere in my brain. Sometimes, I can literally feel the language slipping away from me. The kids start screaming, usually when I'm in the middle of something, and it just.......goes away. Now I have three paragraphs of proof. Language hasn't left me. It just runs and hides when life gets in the way.

This morning, for example. I sat on the sofa, burping Amelia for the ten thousandth time. Virginia came up and demanded "Seh-ME," which is Virginia speak for Sesame Street. Then, she realized Amelia was watching her. Virginia smiled. Amelia smiled. Virginia tilted her head in to kiss her sister. Amelia cooed and smiled some more. And language failed. Sometimes only hugs can say what needs to be said.

The littlest is stirring. It's about to be un-quiet. Let's see how long it takes me to do this again. Let's hope it's not another nine months.